Sunday, October 28, 2012

Goodbye to twenty-five

Another year come and gone.  Twenty-Six.  I feel as old as the hills.  Really.

I do have hope though.  I am pretty sure that 25 may have been my best year yet.  I guess I have no reason not to hope that 26 could get even better!

In this past year, I have gained some real insight on myself and forced down a lot of walls that I didn't realize I still had up.  I feel completely blessed to not only have been graced with a wonderful family, I also have surrounded myself with truly amazing friends that I do not think I could live without.

My little brother, my oldest friend, my inspiration was able to find his true counterpart in life and celebrate through a beautiful wedding and reception.  This year they have really begun their lives together, and I cannot wait to watch them grow.

This year, I have found myself in activities that never interested me before.  I have become an avid outdoorsman.  I found my peace of mind through the tranquility of those early Mississippi mornings in the woods and those late Louisiana evenings on the water.

This man has shown me more about myself than I ever thought possible.  It never ceases to amaze me when I look back and see how much I have truly places that I didn't even know I was lacking.

I have found meaning through music.  I have learned that what I really need after a trying day is an escape.  I need to be able to get away from the stressors, and it took me until this year to really figure out what I need to calm myself and get back my sanity.  Work will always be crazy regardless of who you are or what you do.  There is a lot to be said for being able to reign yourself back in without sacrificing your family through hostility and wrongly directed anger.

Music is my escape.  Music that lets nothing else into my mind.  The beat overtakes me, the volume controls my thoughts, I can't think or stress about anything else.  I can feel the anxieties of the day melting away the louder it gets.

Riding around and going nowhere in particular with good for the soul music blaring is another part of that.  Running with the music beating in my ears so loudly that I can't think of anything but controlling my breathing and moving my legs is another escape.

This past weekend I found another mind saving escape that I didn't know my body craved.  Four wheeler riding.  That is what I wanted to do for my birthday.  Go to a four wheeler track, get lost in the trails, be absolutely covered in mud, not have a single care in the world.  It is what we did.  An entire weekend of breathing the Mississippi air, surrounded by dirt roads, music, and the companionship of my husband.  It did more for me than I could have ever imagined.  It was the best weekend by far.  I relished in the fact that I was with my other half, the man who some days has the ability to absolutely annoy every fiber of my being yet completes my soul all at the same time.
I loved that this was all I could see ahead of me...

And if I wanted to look behind this is the exciting scene I would find...

Twenty-five years of living.  Twenty-five years of growing.  Twenty-six is no longer on the is here.  I am trying to block out all thoughts on the fact that I am only four short years from thirty.  That really is a moot point right now, right?

For now we will just concentrate on enjoying life, living for the moment, and building our relationship and lives stronger every day.  

Birthdays come and go.  Here's to twenty-six...may you be as good, if not better than twenty-five!