Monday, February 28, 2011

Great advice

I do not have time to be blogging right now.  Things are so crazy busy.  Like seriously I am freaking out.  I think I just prided myself in my last post for not stressing over all this wedding stuff.  Well, today that went out the window.  I am in the middle of trying to finish painting a spare bedroom before the wedding festivities begin.  This morning, as I was painting, I realized that I am getting married in twenty days...TWENTY DAYS!  The stress really kicked in then.  I think more than anything I am stressing over the fact that the rehearsal dinner will be at Josh's house.  That means that the walls have to be finished being painted, floor has to be laid where we have already ripped out carpet, the yard needs to be cleaned, the fish pond is many things to do!

I was having a complete freak out moment when my friend, the one and only Baker-Smith, brought me back down.  I knew I needed her calming, level headed advice...that's why I texted her in a tizzy!  I think she could feel my tension.  She talked to me for awhile about not stressing, that everything would work out, that I had friends and family to help me.  She offered to put together my guest book which is going to be more amazing than I could have ever imagined.  She is truly a lifesaver.

So after she put me all back together and I was feeling more at peace, she sent me this text...
"I'm doing my marriage counseling book on my lunch break (she's becoming a Mrs. on Josh's b'day).  A friend suggested in the last month before the wedding to write down daily thoughts.  I know you are busy and everything, but I am going to try to send you at least a thought or a question a day.  Take about five minutes to just think about it.  Today's is 'list ten reasons why you want to marry your partner'.  Type them up and keep each one.  It's just something to look back on or share with Josh when it's all finished and you're settled in."

Great advice right?  Well here goes...

Ten reasons I want to marry Josh:

1. He's my best friend.  I feel like I can tell him anything.  He is the first one I call when something great happens, and he is the first person I look to when my day has been really bad.  He's my rock.

2. He gets me.  You can't date someone for seven years and not know almost everything about one another.  He knows all my dirty secrets, yet he loves me just the same.

3. He makes me feel safe.  I know that he will protect me no matter what.

4. He would do anything for family.  Josh's life hasn't always been pretty, but no matter what has happened or will happen he is always there for his family.

5. He sacrificed his wants and needs to be sure that I had everything I needed to get through school.  Of course I had family support too, but Josh did a lot behind the scenes and gave up a lot for me.

6. He wants to go back to school just so he can better himself.  He makes me so proud every day.  He just wants to be the best man he can be.

7. I know he is going to be a great father.  Having kids is a big part of a marriage, and it is something that Josh and I have discussed extensively.  I know he is going to be a great dad, and that means a lot to me.  I want my kids to look up to their dad the same way as I look up to mine.

8. He encourages me.  Josh believes in me more than I believe in myself.  He knows I can do things that oftentimes I doubt.  He always keeps me wanting to achieve more.

9. He is just great at everything.  Josh is crazy funny and an awesome dancer.  Even though I absolutely cannot dance, Josh is great at it and sometimes drops in down in Walmart just because he can (and because it embarrasses me)!  Everybody he meets loves him instantly, and he is amazing at every new skill or trade he tries.  He always encourages me not to live so uptight, and to tap into my fun side.

10. I can't imagine my life any other way.  I get sad when he leaves me, and when the thought crosses my mind of him being gone forever I just can't stand it.  He is my everything.  He makes my world go round.  I think about him all day, and everything I do is driven to better our lives together.  We work hard for one another.  I love him more than I can express.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Let's get real

The reason I have been so anti-blogs is because I don't think they reflect real emotions.  I feel like real emotions are touched on, but then glammed up by flowery words and pretty pictures in order to reach an audience.  So let's get real...

I am going to be a married lady three weeks from today.  THREE WEEKS!  That's crazy!  A day that I have been planning for the past year and a half.  I have been on top of everything.  I read all of the books, and did everything right on time.  No room for mistakes.  Yet despite my superior planning things have still managed to unravel.  Josh and I got word last week that our venue for the rehearsal dinner was unavailable.  The rehearsal dinner has been the highlight of our wedding planning.  It has been the one thing we have really looked forward to because we went out of our way to plan a laid back and relaxing night.  We wanted it low key, we wanted it comfortable.  We couldn't wait for it to get here.  Now, we are unsure about where we will have it.

We have been looking around.  Not surprisingly, every place we have tried is already booked up.  I am trying to keep it all under control.  In a way, I am really not stressed about it.  If you knew me you would know that is so not me because I stress about everything.  I am trying to take a new lease on life starting with this wedding.  I want to live more laid back.  In the end, everything always works out anyway, so why should I stress over it?  As calm about it all as I portray myself to be and as I really credit myself as being, I can still feel the stress of it all weighing me down.  It's weird.  I don't think about it a lot, but at the same time it is always on the back of my mind.

Even though this isn't the best situation, a lot of good has come from it.  We have had four people extend their homes to us for a place to have the rehearsal dinner.  No family ties, just friends.  One of my friends went so far as to offer their house while they were out of town.  They offered to clean out their patio, set up tables, and pop up a big white tent.  One of Josh's friends offered almost the same thing expect he would be there and also extended his help in the kitchen.  God truly has blessed us with great friends.  That is a major offer, and one that we are eternally grateful for.

We still have one venue prospect up in the air.  If it falls through we have decided to have the rehearsal dinner at the house.  Sure it will be more crowded that we had hoped, but at the end of the day it will still be nice.

I don't exactly know what's going to work out with all of this.  I am sure we are far from done fighting this battle.  Every day I tell myself that I wish we would have eloped and taken that great advice we were given the day we got in engaged, but then where would the fun be?  All of this stress and worry will eventually turn into entertaining stories one fact it already is very entertaining for former co-workers.

So for now, I am trying to roll with the punches.  And while that is not naturally my style, I think I may be semi getting the hang of it.  We will see how my nerves stand in three weeks.  Until then it's wedding preparation galore....and I wouldn't want it any other way!

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Generosity in unexpected places

Sometimes people do unexpected things that really touch your heart.  TONS of things have gone on this week...some really great and some really not so great.  The really not so great are still really not so great, but they have brought something very important and meaningful to my attention.  Josh and I have only been in Thibodaux for about five short years now, but in this time we have really met some amazing people.  People who would do anything for us with absolutely no gain for themselves.  People who see their friends going through a difficult time and reach out a hand to help when it is very unexpected.  It just touched my heart so much to see that we have so many people here who care about us.  That means more than anything.  The offers that were extended far exceed the work that we want to place on anyone (other than our immediate family who we aren't afraid of shoving work onto :) ).  The fact is that the offers were made with the most sincere and inviting feelings.  I know they wouldn't offer things if they couldn't or didn't want to provide them.  I just hate to think about placing all that work and stress on anyone else.  In the end, it is all going to work out.  The point of this posting is just to say thank you from the bottom of my heart to a couple people who will probably never read/know about this blog.  That is beside the point.  Words cannot express the way your gestures and generosity has moved me.  THANK YOU.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A nightshift-er I'm not

I just got finished with my first (and only, fingers crossed) week of nightshift.  Definitely not for me!  The first day was one of the tougher ones because I wasn't exactly sure how to prepare myself.  Do I stay up all night and then attempt to sleep all day?  What if I can't sleep during the day?  In the end, I stayed up late, got up early, and then took a nap.  It made for a very long night.  I did find out some very helpful information though.  If you force yourself to stay up all night to work (or do whatever), you will get the best sleep of your life that following day.  Really it was wonderful!
The last night though, it was probably the toughest.  It kind of happened in a stream of things that all resulted in no sleep.  The night before I had worked and pulled an all-nighter..not fun but manageable.  I came home prepared to sleep so well, and sleep so well I did.  That is until phone calls and pertinent situations woke me up by a little past noon.  LOOOONG night is all I can say.
But I did it.  It's done, and Wednesday I will be so happy when the alarm goes off at 5 AM for me to get up and get ready for work.  I do see the perks of night shift.  Better pay at a slower pace.  It also had other perks at home.  I was able to cook supper every night before work and eat at a decent time before I had to leave.  All the perks aside, night shift just isn't for me.  My body can't adjust, and I like getting up early and being awake and moving during the day.
I absolutely love my job though.  It was so tough for me to leave my old job as a tech at a small clinic.  The people there were my family, and they still are.  I cried for days after I left, and once I started my new job I cried again.  Things were so different, so new.  The people there weren't my family sent to guide me through life.  I honestly didn't know if I would make it.
Don't get me wrong.  I was always so grateful and excited to have a job from day one, but the atmosphere was just so different, so foreign to me.  I remember after one of my first days at my new job, we got off a little early so I decided to run by the office to visit.  They were all so excited for me; they wanted to know all about my new job. I collapsed into tears...just fell completely apart.  Several hugs and a Diet Dr. Pepper later I was feeling better.
I guess that's what family is for.  The people you can be your weakest, your rawest around, and you don't have to have any worries about judgement.  They accept you for you; through all the flaws, bad decisions, and tough days.  Family is always there.  Through blood ties or just the ties of friendship turned into family, family is one of the most important things in my life.
Josh and I are blessed.  We have so many families.  Blood families of course...his and mine.  But then God gave us a gift and allowed us to branch out.  Josh has found a true family through Kyle and his family.  He thinks of them all as his family, and for the most part I think they think of him the same way. I have a true family at the office.  I feel like I did a lot of growing up there.  I went through so much in those four years, my life was completely upside down at times, but they were a big part of the reason that I made it through.  We also have family in our friends.  We have been truly, truly blessed with the most awesome and amazing friends.  Sadly, a lot of them live in Mississippi, so we don't see them often but through the distance we know we have them.
This is a photo tribute to our friends...our family. (This is also what happens when you have been working nights.  You finally get the opportunity to be in your bed at nighttime, and then you can't sleep!)

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Bridal Joy

My world now is probably in the most craziest state it has ever been in.  I have been through a lot of crazy times.  I would have sworn that middle of nursing school with major tests, assignments, clinicals, plus work was the craziest life could get.  It's funny because I honestly thought that once I got out of school, passed my boards, and started working that life would slow down and normalize a little for me.  Sadly, I was wrong!  I think the majority of this has to do with the upcoming nuptiuals in the very near future!

Kay Kay came to town today.  Kay Kay is such a great help through all things in life...what would I do without her?  Today she made a six hour stop that turned out to be so productive.  We had our final meeting with the caterer...finalized the menu...talked decorations.  We had our final meeting with the florist...picked colors...sorted out last minute details.  We even went so far as to purchase a rehearsal dinner outfit and an outfit to wear on the honeymoon cruise.  She cleaned some scrub tops for me, did some quick decorating, and then hit the road!

My head is spinning with everything wedding related and Josh's school related that needs to be done tomorrow.  Plus there are those things that I really want to do like work on my wedding scrapbook all day.  And there are those things that I really need to do but don't have the time or energy to do like paint the guest bedroom.  Is this what life as a grown up feels like?  Go, go, go until it's time for my head to hit the pillow at night?  My poor dogs miss me, and I miss them.  How could I not...just look at this face!
This one misses me too, but this is Josh's dog so we have a slightly different relationship even though I do love him dearly.  (He is just big and he sheds...not his fault though I don't guess!)
I even think Josh misses me; although, he will probably never admit to it.  I sure do miss him a whole lot too!  I see him every day, but it just seems like everything is so rushed these days!
Ahh well.  Such is life I suppose!  And if it weren't crazy busy I wouldn't be happy.  I seem to get more accomplished through all the stress.

But no matter how busy everything is right now, I had to make time a couple days ago to put everything down and just go "home".  I went back to my old work office...back to my roots.  It was like a breath of fresh air.  I brought a carton of ice cream and intended to go for a quick drop by.  Three hours later I was still sitting around talking.  It felt so good.  I didn't realize how much I missed everyone and how badly I needed everyone until I went by and spent some quality time with them.  I needed my second family.  They have made such an impact on my life.  Even though I have a new job now, I still need them as a support system, as my reference point, as my friends.  I take comfort in knowing that they will always be there for me.

As the hours get later, I guess it's time for to catch up on my 'Housewife' drama and trash I have on the DVR.  Tomorrow is another day filled with more wedding planning and chaos!

Monday, February 14, 2011

The Beginning of a New Era

I don't typically fall prey to pitfalls of "hype".  I chalk internet blogging up to hype.  For the most part, I have looked at bloggers as people who portray fabricated emotions for the purposes of entertaining (with the exception of a rare few including a beef cake, talula, and a supermom of 3 :)).  Recent developments, however, have lead me to cast doubt on my prior theories.  Maybe I was wrong I spoke too prematurely.  And you know what?  Had I never gone with the hype I would have missed out on some of the finer things in life (i.e. Uggs, my laptop, my iPhone (gasp), the list could go on and on).  Long story short, sometimes it is not a bad thing to go with the crowd.

2011 has proven to be an exciting year for me already.  In this past month and a half I have started a new job, passed a big test, and acquired some new initials...RN!  Even more exciting, more new initials are just over the horizon for me.  ACD.  I cannot wait!  The soon to be Mrs.  And while we have our ups and downs, and we fight as everyone else does...I feel like we have something special.  Josh and I have stood the test of time.  Seven years down and we are closer than ever.  He is my rock, he makes me a better person, he is my secret keeper, he is my encourager, he is the first person I call when my day is going really good or when my day is going really bad, he is honestly my best friend.  It is an amazing story.  Feel free to read all about it here.

With 2011 has also come sadness.  The loss of  a great man.  Paps was everyone's grandfather and everyone's role model.  He was an inspiration on how a Godly person should live.  I lost both of my grandfathers years ago...I miss them dearly every day.  Paps was a dear friend's grandfather who took us all in and welcomed us as his own.  To Josh, he was HIS grandfather.  He is still taking the loss hard.  As we rolled back into Mississippi in the early morning hours of that Monday morning with great sadness on our hearts, we were comforted by the outstretched arms of our high school friends who have now become as close (if not closer) than family.

But the final news of far at brand new BABY LYON who will be here in October!  I cannot wait to be Aunt Claire (a play on words of sort since Anne Claire apparently sounds so much like Aunt Claire every time I introduce myself to someone), and I am already trying to hold myself back from buying the whole mall out as well as every baby boutique I pass.  Mama and Daddy Lyon are going to be such awesome parents.  I can't wait as we all begin this next step in our lives!

So for now, that is it from me.  I decided to just dabble in the blogging world if only to clear my mind and get things off my chest.  We will see what it turns in to.  But whatever it, I am sure it will be an exciting ride!